Those who experienced childhood abuse will go through a different journey than those who didn't. It can be sometimes difficult to explain this journey to someone who's never experienced it before. At the end of the day, it's your journey and your life to own. And finding peace with your journey opens doors to so many great things that you didn't even realize before.
Choices are made based on the thoughts and feelings we have. These thoughts can sometimes be created by past woes, experiences and triggers. Tuning them out isn't as simple as saying you have a choice. People who experienced childhood abuse and trauma need to regain a sense of themselves before they can learn to make healthier choices consistently.
When people live with the pain of depression, anxiety and anger, it's even more critical to become more self-aware of the ups and downs of the powerful emotions and re-channel them through expressive words. This is especially true for men who struggle at home communicating their wounds to their wives and kids. Men who are unable to recognize the reasons behind their struggles, need to take a deeper dive and explore what could be triggering some of their unwanted feelings. And for men who don't, may fall into a deep abyss of their depression and anxiety. If improperly managed, it can lead to anger and in many cases emotional, verbal and physical abuse.
Healing takes time. It takes patience and then right when you think things are on track, it takes even more patience. Depression, anxiety and anger have been banes in my life. When I failed to raise self-awareness to my anxiety and depression, my anger popped like a shaken can of soda.
It still amazes me how we don’t talk more about anger and its relationship to our mental health. I feel that everyone has a responsibility for their own mental health and isn't just for people who have been diagnosed by their GP's.
The feeling of having a healthy supply of self-worth is something I can only imagine might have been more readily available, natural and automatic if I was able to see that in myself as a child. As an adult survivor of childhood abuse, self-worth was not supplied in healthy doses while growing up.
It amazes me how we don't talk more about how anger is related to our mental health. It holds us back from finding happiness. Over the years, I've learned that the key to my struggles with anger, depression and anxiety was that I couldn't accept it. I eventually realized I couldn't sit back and continue to live with it. I boldly concluded that I needed to do something about it.
It's never easy to look ourselves in the mirror and see where we struggle with our behaviors. Yet, when we ask the question whether there's room for self-improvement, the answer is often times a yes. How do we make those changes in ourselves? How do we take those difficult steps? I learned the hard way through my own struggles and losses how to make those self-improvements happen. A life plagued by anger, abuse and mental health struggles, I discovered ways to get out of those unhealthy patterns and into a life that's focused and clear.
One of my goals is to reach out and connect with men particularly in ethnic communities. I'd like to break the stereotypes and barriers that ethnic men don't talk about mental health. Needless to say, I'm proud to share that I am an Asian male openly talking about my struggles with depression, anger and anxiety.